Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” ~ Matthew 19:14
I shared the post below on Medium at https://medium.com/@emmalouie.
For many years, anger simmered beneath my consciousness. If it seeped into awareness, then I pressed it back down.
When I was seven, my brothers Alex and Phillip were six and four, respectively. My brothers and I accepted salvation and wanted to get baptized. Momma Hettie (Called ‘momma’ by everyone because she was a midwife.), the self-appointed voice of our missionary Baptist church’s baptizing committee, refused to allow it.
Momma Hettie told our mother that we were too young. She claimed that we didn’t know what we were saying by accepting Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior at such young ages.
She spewed out extra judgmental words about Phillip. She insisted that he only followed his brother and sister to the altar.
A couple of years later, Alex and I were baptized. But not Phillip. Momma Hettie still declared him too young.
Phillip never got baptized. He took his life at twenty years old. He hung himself from a tree on a university campus.
My precious, playful, loving baby brother was gone from this world.
I never considered baptism a requirement for heaven. Overwhelmed with heartache and grief, I felt angry… angry that the church failed to baptize my handsome brother.
A dark, shadowy, smothering cloud hovered above my head. Covering me everywhere I went, blocking out the sun for the longest time.
But time brings about change.
Phillip left this world over three decades ago. The menacing cloud has dissipated. I am grateful for the sunshine.
Anger over my baby brother not getting baptized has transformed into peace. I embraced Matthew 19:14. Trusting that Phillip securely rests with his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
I am an avid church attendee. However, I have learned to distinguish organized religion from a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
God bless. . . I am Wiley’s granddaughter.
